last dream

last dream woke me up very early. it did not grip me with trauma but haunting me for quite some time.

i walked into a hotel with some other guy recently known may be at a new assignment. he perhaps from my country of origin. hotel keeper gives me a key to a room and i checked the key unlocking the door but did not looked in. i presumed it must be empty. i go with the other guy's room who stays in the same hotel. at late night i head for my room and open it and find it filled with people about six beds and dozen occupant. perhaps two in each bed. i was horrified. i must have my separate bed. one said he was going sleep on floor and i could sleep in the cot. it was very late hours, i needed a bed to sleep. as soon as i approach the cot i am surrounded by the dozen none wearing clothes and they are touching me. i run out of the room. somewhere in that same hotel in separate room zinia and joya is living but neither like to stay in their room nor like to know how they live. Problem I must solve.

waking up i am solving my problem.

i can no longer conduct another experiment with another known or unknown individual again in my life for whatever reason.

this dream was result of an accident happened to a neighbor. he is in hospital needing surgery. he is husband of a friend of joya. she wished me to be involved. i told her i would do wherever she wish me to take her and do what is possible under my circumstances. she said that she needs people. i did not answer. i do not need anyone including her and her children. they are on their own.

all is completely on their own.

i am not relation meaning thereby i do not even blink anything happens to anyone in my world.
when anything happens to me no one knows.
i swallow my perception and do not blink.