tomorrow
Once upon a time I used to read Asterix. King of Gaul had one fear while traveling atop of a gold dish carried Obelix that sky may fall on his head tomorrow. But then he was not so afraid.
Since tomorrow never comes.
I am afraid of tomorrow and because it always comes. The quest every morning I ask myself. How am I just now. Would I enjoy rest of the day? Morning is a panic for me. I make all test known to me without moving. Before I certify myself I get up knowing there is no more bright and exciting for me not today and tomorrow never comes.
I am literally scared of tomorrow. All the evidence I got there is nothing to smile about. I wish I am not there to see it. Given all that uncomfortable days I have had for last 68+ years.
These days I am very comfortable of all pains and excitements that I am having is hard to bear. About two decades ago one of my friends dad died after receiving his electric bill. He just return home after visiting his son. There were many letters. He opened his electric bill while his wife went for a bath. He did not like the bill. He thought of visiting the office to enquire further. Shortly after he had heart attack and died instantly. He was unfit to bear the excitement of living in his world.
Today I am him. I do not like to open my mail. It is too much of an excitement. Always BAD. It is no longer possible to imagine my death while asleep.
Since tomorrow never comes.
I am afraid of tomorrow and because it always comes. The quest every morning I ask myself. How am I just now. Would I enjoy rest of the day? Morning is a panic for me. I make all test known to me without moving. Before I certify myself I get up knowing there is no more bright and exciting for me not today and tomorrow never comes.
I am literally scared of tomorrow. All the evidence I got there is nothing to smile about. I wish I am not there to see it. Given all that uncomfortable days I have had for last 68+ years.
These days I am very comfortable of all pains and excitements that I am having is hard to bear. About two decades ago one of my friends dad died after receiving his electric bill. He just return home after visiting his son. There were many letters. He opened his electric bill while his wife went for a bath. He did not like the bill. He thought of visiting the office to enquire further. Shortly after he had heart attack and died instantly. He was unfit to bear the excitement of living in his world.
Today I am him. I do not like to open my mail. It is too much of an excitement. Always BAD. It is no longer possible to imagine my death while asleep.
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