invisible ink that flows
i thought I could write no more. My writable material has disappeared.
After truth what can i write - transients are stories without any merit to be written - for what purpose
but i am writing again in invisible ink for nobody including me - all have permanently died and do not even exist as cloud
I do not know about others but whenever i have pain, that finds its way as my writing and i have to wait till the ink dries and become invisible
I spent about ten days about one hour every day in May 2012 in hospital with my brother Kamal - I saw him reading watching TV and talking to people or silent with me when alone
his face was bright smiling and devoid of any pain or disability. i could not believe that he is incapable of leaving his bed or walk to the attached toilet. He could not stand on his leg!!! This did not even show when I was alone with him. He never complained about any pain.
He was not paralyzed. He told me this only to correct my presumption about his abilities. He didn't lose his hope of getting his abilities back for 5 more years as promised by his doctors and consuming painful maddening chemo that did not show in his face. he could write and sent a wrong letter after I left. I of course knew that his treatment was wrong and i urged that to be stopped and begged his doctors. But I was not listened to. I do not go mad or pained in the presence of any even my death.
My status as an innocent never change no matter what. I am under constant blissful protection of truth.
today i know truth cannot be stopped. The snake crawls leaving no visible trail through the stone wall of protection without any hole to poison life to death. The same event took place for my brothers' death. Their innocence glowed even after their death.
[
Plato says that Socrates’s last words were, “Crito, we owe a cock to Asclepius; pay it and don’t forget.” Asclepius was the god of healthy, and the sacrifice of a cock was a normal offering of thanks for recovery from illness. Socrates believed he was cured of the disease of life, and was not frightened by his death.
]
death or age do not show in face for some, but most go through many decades of their life bearing unstoppable pain in miserable living - they go mad and shout obscenities incessantly till their life leaves them
PAIN UNBEARABLE PAIN FOR MANY DECADES
I am told - hearsay - pain is nerve mechanism to transmit the message to the logical part of the brain about approximate position of some undesirable chemical - lactic acid by nerve end near that place of its accumulation in the body. pain killer can disable the nerve end of sensitivity but does not cure the accumulation or cause. The cause can simply be indigestion. Inability to digest what is eaten. Why does not one go hungry for few days? One cannot. The hunger of human is due to sight smell and simulated satisfaction by rational or logic part of the brain. Today I do not smoke or take coffee tea or many kinds of food even when aroused by them when reading a book. I do not even eat them when I am repeatedly asked by my hosts in parties. I do not visit any eating place. I am limited to eating three meals and limited in quantity, often cooked by me boiled hot rice and lentils without spices for taste with salt ghee and some green chilly pieces. I also do not get aroused by phone calls. I miss them. When I speak on phone I am not aroused either I only listening
TRUTH HAS MADE ME FREE. Truth is I am innocent and my incapacity to break my silence - no matter what.
truth is now ~ mother of all pain ~ destination painless reality - this can be reached not by prayers faith recitation or devotion but only by seeing Now without any further wish. Whom to beg? Can truth exist without me? truth alone is immortal. I have no option but bear all pain ~ truth pain now are inseparable indivisible one.
Purana story: Jayadrata was about immortal; his father had a boon granted by death that his son's head rolls off his body to earth, the responsible head too would roll off to ground. jayadrata head guided to land on the lap his father in meditation. Instinctively his father rolled the head to the ground. Both died simultaneously.
After truth what can i write - transients are stories without any merit to be written - for what purpose
but i am writing again in invisible ink for nobody including me - all have permanently died and do not even exist as cloud
I do not know about others but whenever i have pain, that finds its way as my writing and i have to wait till the ink dries and become invisible
I spent about ten days about one hour every day in May 2012 in hospital with my brother Kamal - I saw him reading watching TV and talking to people or silent with me when alone
his face was bright smiling and devoid of any pain or disability. i could not believe that he is incapable of leaving his bed or walk to the attached toilet. He could not stand on his leg!!! This did not even show when I was alone with him. He never complained about any pain.
He was not paralyzed. He told me this only to correct my presumption about his abilities. He didn't lose his hope of getting his abilities back for 5 more years as promised by his doctors and consuming painful maddening chemo that did not show in his face. he could write and sent a wrong letter after I left. I of course knew that his treatment was wrong and i urged that to be stopped and begged his doctors. But I was not listened to. I do not go mad or pained in the presence of any even my death.
My status as an innocent never change no matter what. I am under constant blissful protection of truth.
today i know truth cannot be stopped. The snake crawls leaving no visible trail through the stone wall of protection without any hole to poison life to death. The same event took place for my brothers' death. Their innocence glowed even after their death.
[
Plato says that Socrates’s last words were, “Crito, we owe a cock to Asclepius; pay it and don’t forget.” Asclepius was the god of healthy, and the sacrifice of a cock was a normal offering of thanks for recovery from illness. Socrates believed he was cured of the disease of life, and was not frightened by his death.
]
death or age do not show in face for some, but most go through many decades of their life bearing unstoppable pain in miserable living - they go mad and shout obscenities incessantly till their life leaves them
PAIN UNBEARABLE PAIN FOR MANY DECADES
I am told - hearsay - pain is nerve mechanism to transmit the message to the logical part of the brain about approximate position of some undesirable chemical - lactic acid by nerve end near that place of its accumulation in the body. pain killer can disable the nerve end of sensitivity but does not cure the accumulation or cause. The cause can simply be indigestion. Inability to digest what is eaten. Why does not one go hungry for few days? One cannot. The hunger of human is due to sight smell and simulated satisfaction by rational or logic part of the brain. Today I do not smoke or take coffee tea or many kinds of food even when aroused by them when reading a book. I do not even eat them when I am repeatedly asked by my hosts in parties. I do not visit any eating place. I am limited to eating three meals and limited in quantity, often cooked by me boiled hot rice and lentils without spices for taste with salt ghee and some green chilly pieces. I also do not get aroused by phone calls. I miss them. When I speak on phone I am not aroused either I only listening
TRUTH HAS MADE ME FREE. Truth is I am innocent and my incapacity to break my silence - no matter what.
truth is now ~ mother of all pain ~ destination painless reality - this can be reached not by prayers faith recitation or devotion but only by seeing Now without any further wish. Whom to beg? Can truth exist without me? truth alone is immortal. I have no option but bear all pain ~ truth pain now are inseparable indivisible one.
Purana story: Jayadrata was about immortal; his father had a boon granted by death that his son's head rolls off his body to earth, the responsible head too would roll off to ground. jayadrata head guided to land on the lap his father in meditation. Instinctively his father rolled the head to the ground. Both died simultaneously.
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